December 29, 2011

H.B. Ryan.

By rkoch88

when I first met you I was jealous.
who is this guy?
why does everyone I know, know him?
why don’t I?
who is this guy?
okay, he can sing
I guess we can be friends.

years passed, songs were sang and played.
together.
we both messed up our lives.
we fell apart.
then you left.
I guess we can’t be friends.

years passed, I decided to do ministry.
college found us.
earlier hurts never let me forgive.
every presence set hairs on edge.
we both messed up our lives.
we fell apart.
then you left.
I guess we can’t be friends.

years passed, I became religious.
life found us.
never really got over our pasts.
tried to overlook everything.
one tiny mistake, one letter later
then you left.
I thought I was right.

years passed, I was wrong.
God found us.
with help from a friend
and the car crash that kept me.
because a place of such passion.
because our God restored us.
I was wrong.
you returned.
Thank God I was wrong.

I’ve never seen such restoration
as through our friendship.
I thank you for forgiving me.
I was wrong about you.
I thank God for you
and that I was wrong.

Leave a comment | posted in Life, Poetry

December 7, 2011

here and there

By rkoch88

I wake up thinking there.
I go through my day thinking there.
I live my life wanting there.

but I’m here.
and here is not there.

the lull between the here and here.
seems that’s where I lay my claim.
I’m in the temporary.

Leave a comment | posted in Poetry

November 10, 2011

dream : path

By rkoch88

I have this reoccurring dream
this dream that God put inside of me
it swirls and turns up in my head
and all I know is I want it

You promised redemption
You promised freedom
I know that it is coming
I know You are coming soon

my path with God isn’t a normal one
it isn’t the automatic turn that so many felt
mine was the yelling and cursing kind
the one that I fought for a long time
the one where you keep coming back to it because you know it is better
but you just can’t help but struggle with it
staying up late at night trying to make sense of every little bit
trying to rationalize everything that you’ve gone through
trying to justify my past and correct my future
my path is the crooked one with thorns on it
the one where you are screaming every step of the way because it hurts
that’s my path
the one like in those old cartoons where someone would be walking in a deep dark forest all alone
and the kid keeps hearing these noises in the bushes off the path
and the kid keeps seeing these beaty eyes through the darkness
but my path is where those eyes are right beside me
the monsters along the path aren’t just eyeing you from their own safety
the monsters are sacrificing themselves to get to me
jumping out at me every chance they get
and with every leap they take a little bit of my flesh
and the noise is the monsters all laughing as I keep trying to walk
that’s my path

confidence and reluctance builds in the same conditions
you either build one and forget the other
or maybe you’re like me and you build them both
but they wait for their times to shine

freedom is a gift received through perseverance
and that’s why people give up on their faith
that’s why people live defeated
that is why I have to be different
that is why I have to make choices most others won’t
that even through my path I won’t relent
redemption came through a similar path
one man having His flesh completely ripped from the muscle
beautiful imagery, my flesh the sin that covers me
and the man that see the monsters remove it from me
even after he washed this flesh and threw no stone

Leave a comment | posted in Freedom, Redemption, Song Ideas

August 4, 2011

Days like today

By rkoch88

I’m not finished with college.  Yes, I know this is a tragedy.  Everyone asks with expectation “where did you go to college?”

I answer, “Oh I’m not done quite yet.”

The funny thing about that answer isn’t so much that I’m still awaiting my chance to move on from the confines of Lincoln, but the fact that I am far better off doing what I am doing now than what I had been at school.

 

Days like today really get to me.  They burrow on into my creative and inspirational makeup and decide to stay for awhile.
Days like today really help me. Accomplishing so much in such a little amount of time, pushing past limits I have implemented on myself.

Days like today happen more now that I am at Elevate than they ever did in 4+ years at Lincoln. Don’t get me wrong, Lincoln is a great school if you go there for the right programs, but it wasn’t until finding my niche at Elevate that days like today happened.

Our Pastor challenges us each and every week, everything that he wants from us is big.
(Headsup: If you aren’t in a church where your pastor asks big from you, rethink why you’re there.)

Everything he asks from us is to fulfill our Church mission.
(MISSON: We are a church for unchurched people to find life in Christ.)

It wasn’t until I gave more time to my church than I gave to worrying about my school grades and social standing amongst its students that I realized the heart of Elevate. Everything we are doing is for people to find Life. Never before has this been so burdened on my heart. I think that throughout a christian life there is complacency that occurs on the unchurched people we see. Sometimes resentment.

It’s days like today that push me deeper into the vision and mission of Elevate.

If your heart hurts for the lost, then hurt with me. Hold nothing back and openly love the lost. Wherever you are and at whichever church you serve at, find your footing. Let loose your personal chains and love.

Days like today only happen when we love.

1 comment | posted in Life

July 23, 2011

“What are you doing now?”

By rkoch88

Kristi and I were married on June 10th and, believe it or not, the biggest question asked is not “How’s married life?”  The biggest thing that people want to know is “what are you doing now?”

That’s a funny question.  Believe it or not I am doing precisely what I am supposed to be doing right now.  Not having a job has afforded me much time to progress my skills in various areas.  Creating videos, learning Objective-C, and creating proposals for live video systems.  More than anything else though I am progressing my usefulness.

Growing up in the church means that you are always there at every event, potluck or shindig whether or not you were asked.  You were there.  Until recently that is all I have ever felt about serving at a church.  Last summer Elevate Church was introduced to me.  Serving is all I did that summer.  Jax and I were constantly at Elevate from the very moment we walked in.  Our second week there we ended up helping tear up all the old pews that were going to be exchanged for chairs.  Since those first weeks I’ve started working as the Lead Producer for the experiences.  Every week there are a few of us who gather together and strategically plan out each weekend in order to be the most effective and genuine.  I am no longer “there” in the sense of spacial confines, but I am now here.

I am right where I need to be.  I am doing what I need to be doing.  I am in the midst of the here and now that is Elevate Church and the movement that God is doing in Morton, Illinois.  I am overwhelmed by the vision the God has placed over Elevate.

If you are a part of Elevate then you better prepare for what is yet to come.

If you are not a part of Elevate then I invite you to come and witness what is happening.  9.15 am and 11 am every sunday morning.  You don’t have to stick around every week if you are currently at a different church, but I promise you that you will not forget the feeling of your first Elevate Experience.

“What are you doing now?”  I am living more than I ever have before.

1 comment | posted in Uncategorized

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